Random Musings

Congrats to the White Sox for sweeping the Astros in the World Series. Now, is it too much to ask that the Series not be a sweep next year? Houston should have seen this coming - you sign Roger Clemens and his ego, and bad things always happen.

Any chance that Baltimore can land now-marquee free agent 1B Paul Konerko? I believe the answer is no.

Over at Daily Kos, kos himself has been eagerly awaiting what he refers to as Fitzmas. As have I - where are the indictments? Let's get these guys locked up! And throw Dick 'torture is fine by me, as long as the experts at the CIA are in charge' Cheney in there too. Please?!?

Speaking of the CIA, I see tourists walking around D.C. all the time with FBI and CIA hats on. How is that cool? Those agencies have not exactly been known for their competence in recent years. It's like visiting Los Angeles and stocking up on Clippers merchandise - what's the point? OK, I guess I can sort of understand the CIA gear, if the tourist is a big torture fan.

I'm currently reading Salman Rushdie's The Satanic Verses, and while I still have 200+ pages to go, so far I don't see what the big deal is. Perhaps once I finish the book, I'll better understand the rationale - if one can even use that word to describe the call for the murder of a writer due to a work of fiction - behind the Ayatollah Khomeini's 1989 fatwa. But I sincerely doubt it.

A Pleasant Diversion

I found that this....simulator(?) is a surpisingly soothing - if somewhat bizarre - break in the midst of a hectic work day/week/month.

Halloween Is Coming Up!

Of course, that just means that we must all be extra diligent; beware of the bloodthirsty and terrifying....were-taco.

Vampire iPods

Don't get me wrong, I really like my iPod mini, even if it has been rendered somewhat obsolete by the iPod nano. And as most of you are well aware, I've always enjoyed a good Halloween costume. But I must draw the line at paying $40 for a costume for my iPod, no matter how cute it is.

Bill Maher, Always Good for a Laugh

The posts are coming at blinding speed the last few days! Here's Bill Maher, weighing in about Harriet Miers' lack of a husband or kids:

But this sort of barrenness is threatening to the Republican base because they're generally people who hate sex and are bad at it. So they fear that their own population will dwindle because there won't be enough Republicans willing to fuck each other. Harriet Miers isn't using the equipment God gave her for making babies, and that's just wrong. It's like God giving you a beautiful garden and you not strip mining it for coal.

Leo Mazzone, Pitching Genius?

It's been a long-standing question in baseball; during all those years of Atlanta Braves pitching dominance, how much credit did pitching coach Mazzone deserve for all of the Cy Youngs, the 20-game winners, and the top-five staff ERAs almost every season? We may know the answer to that question starting next season. If Leo signs on with his good friend Sam Perlozzo and miraculously turns the putrid Baltimore staff around, then there can no longer be any doubt that he's the real deal.

Yet Another Reason to Flee the Country

Other than the current administration, that is. I'm talking about faster, cheaper internet access in other places around the world. Japan: 16 times faster than DSL, $22/month. France: 10x faster, $38/month (includes 100 channels of digital TV and unlimited telephone service also). This Salon.com article tells the story - I don't usually link to Salon since it's a subscription site that makes you watch an ad to read an article if you're not a subscriber, but check it out if you feel like it. To summarize though, the U.S. falling behind in broadband access, speed and affordability is yet another example of corporations and their lobbyists successfully lobbying to protect and increase profits at the expense of citizens and communities.

Never fear though, Google is here! Maybe. Is free Wi-Fi or broadband access desirable if it means being potentially bombarded with targeted advertising? Well, let's look at broadcast TV and conventional radio - is this use of public bandwidth really serving the public? Have you tuned into FM radio lately? Ugh. Perhaps the Internets are such different beasts, that such a comparison with more traditional uses of bandwidth isn't valid. Free broadband and Wi-Fi could be the impetus for the transformation of the Web into a true on-demand, content-rich, independent media source accessible by everyone. Or it could mean watching more commercials, reading more ads, and deleting more Spam.

On a more personal note, this is Charm City Blogger's 100th post! Cue falling balloons and confetti! I'd like to thank Google, Blogger.com, Mozilla, Tim Berners-Lee, DARPA, and Al Gore for making it all possible.

Neat Map Project

I dig maps (who doesn't?), so I'm stoked about the Common Census web site, which takes user input such as where you live and what locality and big city you closely identify with, and creates a U.S. map based on major cities' spheres of influence. So check out the site and enter your data - the more data points the better.

AND for sports fans, it's got a sports map also that attempts to map out spheres of influence for pro and college sports teams. So far, only the NFL and MLB maps are available, but they both show some unexpected, if somewhat intuitive, results. On the NFL map, check out the Green Bay Packer's area down in Mississippi and northern Louisiana (Brett Favre hails from MS). And on the MLB map, there must be a lot of Chicago-area retirees itn Arizona, because it's evidently Cubs country out there. It's also worth noting that after 2,500 entries for the MLB map, Diamondback fans are non-existent, while the Devil Rays do have actual fans!

What would be really fascinating, was if this project collected data for 10, 20, 50, 100 years. How would the city spheres and sports team 'boundaries' change? Would identification with cities change with the economy/real estate market/job growth/etc.? And would the sports boundaries correlate with winning percentage, as would be expected? I couldn't help but notice the Orioles' area is very small, appropriate for eight straight losing seasons, while the new team on the block, the Nationals, have a huge area that currently stretches into he Carolinas. Would the Mets' area in the late 60s and early 70s have rivaled that of the Yankees? How huge was the Reds' area in the mid 70s, or the Twins in the late 80s? Are associations with metro areas and sports teams more fluid on the coasts, where one would expect that people are more transient than in Central and Mountain states?

Perhaps the coolest thing about this map project is that the founder of the site, some guy originally from "Up-State" New York with a poly-sci degree who now lives in Rio de Janeiro, conceived the idea over a barbecue lunch one day. Does this mean that I should try to do more deep thinking during my lunch breaks?

New 007 Announced

I think that James Bond fans will be quite satisfied with the choice of Daniel Craig to replace Pierce Brosnan as 007. I've only seen him in one film, last year's excellent gangster caper Layer Cake, but I was impressed. I was hoping for Clive Owen to accept the role - he apparently was offered it but turned it down - but Craig is a great choice, IMO. Maybe he'll be able to inject some life into the character; Pierce Brosnan seemed bored as hell during the last few films, like he couldn't wait to get out of the role. Of course, maybe he was just tired of waiting for a nipple to appear.

One Down, One to Go

I think we should all send out a big thank-you to the Chicago White Sox, who spared us another postseason of Red Sox vs. Yankees. I admit, last year's seven-game series was the most exciting playoff series I've ever seen, and it sure didn't hurt that the Yankees lost. But all the hype - the idea that the entire country is riveted by two East Coast teams battling it out, the selling of this as a storied sports rivalry even though historically the Red Sox get their asses handed to them ninety-percent of the time, the deification of Derek Jeter, Mariano Rivera, and Curt Schilling by the morons at Fox - is a bit much to bear. Hopefully the Angels can finish off the Yanks this weekend, and we won't have to hear about either A.L. East team anymore this postseason.

Now, how about those White Sox? Looking at the matchup from a mascot perspective, which Jenny likes to do, it's somewhat counter-intuitive to expect the White Sox to vanquish the Red Sox so easily. Throw them in the wash together, and a red sock will usually exert its colorful will on a white sock; that white sock is coming out of the washer as a pink sock, which is definitely not a suitable mascot. Maybe if you washed them on cold, and put them in the dryer right after the final spin cycle, the white sock stands a fighting chance. But probably not.

So here's hoping the White Sox go all the way this year. They've got the pitching, they're an exciting team to watch, and they're a new face in playoffs that have featured the same six to ten teams for the past three or four years. And from a mascot perspective, they're a team that everyone should be able to get behind. What's more populist than a white sock? Go ahead, look in your sock drawer. Any red socks in there? Maybe. But I'm willing to bet that everyone, no matter your age, ethnicity, gender, socio-economic status, or sports affiliation, has at least one pair of white tube socks. How can southerners get behind the Yankees? But I bet they put on some white socks before they head out to the NASCAR race. How do Native Americans get behind the Braves? It's just another sports team appropriating a racist mascot, and besides they never win it all. The Cardinals? Most people have dogs and cats as pets, birds aren't nearly as popular. I could go on, but I think I've made my point. Go Tube Sox! Make Chicago, and the rest of us, proud.

Army 11.4-Miler!

We thought we were running a ten-mile race yesterday morning, but we ended up running 1.4 bonus miles after security concerns forced the course to be re-routed. Therefore, the race was unofficial and I really can't say what my ten-mile time was (because I'm not sure at which point on the course I completed the ten miles). I ran the 11.4 miles in 1:41:38, so assuming a constant pace, I'd have finished 10 miles in 1:29:23. Up until the last real mile marker that I saw, the 7-mile mark, I had been speeding up over each of those first seven miles, so I'd like to think I would have done even better than 89 minutes. I'm satisfied with those numbers though, especially considering that I got less than 5 hours of sleep the night before, and the buffet-food and cocktails I consumed at Liz & Jarriel's wedding on Saturday night didn't exactly constitute carb-loading. It was a flat, fast course, and I'm curious to know how I would have done with more rest and less booze the night before. I'm honestly not sure whether those factors even came into effect.

My dad finished about ten minutes behind me, and like me, was somewhat faster than his anticipated pace (10 minute-miles, 9-minute miles for me). Go Barry! Not bad for an old man, not bad at all. That 11.4 miles was the longest either of us had ever run, so that was kinda cool. We did both agree that no matter how flat the course or pleasant the weather, at some point during a race of that length, you start to question how much fun you're really having. I don't think I'm going out on a limb when I predict no marathons for either of us for at least the next couple of years.

Other than the added course length, we were quite unimpressed with the race planning and logistics. Not only did race officials not notify runners of the change in course and distance until we reached the finish line, but once we made it to the race staging area after the race, it was chaotic. Food and drink distribution locations were a mystery, so you had to wander around until you found the (long) lines for the food). There were people handing out commerative coins, but unless you ran into one of those people, you wouldn't have gotten a coin. They didn't even have enough trash cans, and the Pentagon parking lot was a mess as a result. Bottom line - I'd have to really think twice before signing up next year, although ten-milers are pretty rare so we'll see. I know that it's an 'Army of One', but that one dude needs to get his act together.

Puppets AND Hippie Music!

This morning I was all set to write about this column by the Sun's new sports columnist, and how he got it exactly right - the Orioles won't return to prominence, or even respectability, while Peter Angelos owns the team.

But then I found this video. These Gloves and Boots people took the fantastical hippie sound of the Polyphonic Spree and created a music video starring their puppets! Yeah, the lyrics and the puppet singing don't snyc up all that well, but hey most puppets aren't great singers anyway. What's important is that the video captures the peace, love, flower-child, cult-like vibe of the Spree. Enjoy!

Instant Zombie Classic

I just saw Shaun of the Dead last night for the first time. While not a very scary zombie movie, it's certainly the funniest zombie film I've seen thus far. When I finally get around to starting the all-zombie portion of our DVD collection, it will certainly be an addition. So if you dig zombies, silly British humor, and good filmmaking, check out Shaun of the Dead.

Now a note about most zombie movies - generally the premise is that if one is bitten by a zombie, one will eventually die and be re-animated by the zombie disease/curse/cooties, into another zombie. But after people are first bitten, they always continue to fight off the zombies, even though they should know that they're just going to be one themselves, eventually. So why fight? I mean, you're just going to get to the point that's in every zombie film, when your best friend or brother or girlfriend is going to have to decapitate you or shoot you in the head to protect themselves. So why put them in that tough emotional situation? Once you're bitten, time to throw in the towel!

Of course, it's just instinct to keep fighting when you're attacked by the undead, so I suppose that's part of the reason. Maybe the victim also figures that maybe there's a small chance that they're starring in a zombie film in which the cure for zombieism is found at the end of the movie, and that in that case fighting and becoming a zombie later on beats being torn limb-from-limb by the undead (which is what will happen if you don't fight them off) and ending up just-plain-dead. Don't hold your breath - I've seen a number of zombie films, and that never happens. In fact, the endings are usually pretty bleak for humanity, and relatively bright for the flesh-eating legions of undead.

[Blogger's Note: the word zombie or derivations thereof appear in this post fifteen times! I tried to change it up occassionally, throwing in undead every once in a while. The I got to thinking, are there any other synonyms for zombie that I'm not coming up with? Just one, really. The only word I could find that was specifically appropriate for zombies, as opposed to ghosts, demons, or vampires, was revenant.]

Latest 'W' Joke

Well, maybe it's not the latest, but I just received it by email so it's new to me:

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing.

He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an
accident."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the
President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks..........

How many is a Brazillion???

Negative Publicity & Google

I searched for 'underchuckle' today on Google, and the blog finally shows up! So I'm taking this opportunity, which not-so-coincidentally follows coming home to a second-floor window screen lying -bent and twisted - on the ground in front of our house, to extoll the virtues of the Patterson Park Community Development Corporation. They're the people who we bought the house from, and who offer a one-year comprehensive warranty that is taking them 18 months and counting to fulfill the terms of. They can't measure for or install window screens properly. They can't seem to find a decent plumber. Their customer service response time is measured in months. The list goes on.

Hopefully, Google will continue to work its magic, and all of my blog entries will be indexed someday. And they just maybe, aspiring homeowners who are contemplating a move to the Patterson Park neighborhood and are thinking of buying from the nice people at the CDC will Google said company, and will find this entry. To those visitors, I sincerely beseech you - don't do it. It may seem like a good deal, but dealing with them and their semi-skilled contractors will beget nothing but frustration. Trust me, I've been there.

The Only Weather Site You'll Ever Need

The guy who operates this site is a TV weatherman & meteorologist from Idaho, who believes that Russian - i.e. old Soviet - technology was used (possibly by the Japanese Mafia?) to cause and control Hurricane Katrina. He's leaving his TV gig to devote more time to his 'research'.

Destruction Photos!

As promised (a day late, not that you're surprised by that), the rubble and mayhem that is our Baltimore rowhouse:



Here's the backyard, after its fateful encounter with a jackhammer, a sledgehammer, and some pry bars. I think the hibiscus are a nice touch.







And here is the front railing, after a surprise visit from a dirtbike-riding hoodlum.

Anyone Want Some Concrete?

So I'm having some trouble trying to get rid of all this busted-up concrete that's in our back "yard". Seems that the people who work at concrete recycling companies aren't known for the breadth of their knowledge on those companies' operations. For example, a woman at a local facility could tell me how much they charge for disposal (a nominal $30 fee, no matter how much concrete you have) and how much they charge to drop a dumpster near your house ($75), but not how much to pick up said dumpster. Huh? So she gave me another phone number to call to get that information, and they evidently aren't able to pick up the phone when it rings. The other local place I've tried has still yet to answer their damn phone! I suppose I'm just surprised - and disappointed - that the concrete recycling industry in Baltimore doesn't attract the best and brightest in the construction refuse business.

And yes, I know, I promised to post photos of the concrete rubble and the results of punk-on-a-dirtbike vs. iron railing. What can I say, I have been remiss. I'll post them tomorrow, I promise!

I'm going to a Nationals game with my brother tonight, versus Barry Bonds and the Gigantes. He homered last night at RFK, we'll see if he can make it two nights in a row. The big question of course is, what's he on now? Some stealth steroid? HGH? Or a super-new, high-octane flaxseed oil? We'll probably never know.

MS Doctor Tells Dick Where to Go, Cashes In

So it seems that Dr. Ben Marble is making a bit of money off of his comments to Dick Cheney last week. (You'll recall that last summer Cheney expressed near-identical sentiments to Senator Leahy of Vermont on the Senate floor). I don't have a problem with that; the good doctor has stated pretty clearly that even though his house was destroyed by Katrina, he's not a charity case. And it takes some nerve to walk up to the VP, surrounded by Secret Service, and say what he did. I think the T-Shirt could be a bit flashier though, maybe a photo of Dick, a middle finger, something like that...

Our Latest Export

I would be remiss if I went any longer without mentioning spankledelia.com. For those of you who know Mr. Grau, neither his site's artistic merits nor his...engaging and um, enlightened prose should come as a surprise. He's recently unleashed himself upon London disguised as a mild-mannered (bwaahhahah!) art student. Well, maybe unleashed isn't the right term; it's not quite like the classic Godzilla/Tokyo relationship, because he's not nearly that tall. Anyway, good luck to all involved.

Seriously though, how much damage could he do over there? With what they already think of us thanks to our remedial president, Ryon may actually raise their collective opinion of the U.S.! You know that we live in a very fucked-up world when that last sentence is actually true.
(image from spankledelia, used without permission - I'm married to a lawyer, go ahead and sue!)